First of all, pour out your heart.  Some of the best poetry and music have been about how to get over a broken heart.  If you are not a poet or a musician, consider writing a long letter to your ex.  Let him know how you felt about him and how he hurt you.  But, don’t mail the letter.  Instead, have a ceremony where you burn the letter over a candle.  This will provide you with a ceremonial end to the relationship.

Second, decide that the relationship is really over.  Nothing will keep your broken heart bleeding more than trying to win an ex back when the relationship has died.  Don’t call, text, and email him constantly.  In fact, it may be best to have a month where you don’t talk at all.

Next, go out and spend time with your friends.  Friends can really help you survive a break up.  They may be able to help you talk through some of the issues that went wrong.

But, don’t take advantage of your friend’s time.  Remember that the relationship was far more interesting to you than it was to them.  Also, know that they may have their own agendas in tearing down your ex rather than building you up.

So, while you can certainly talk about your broken heart, also spend time talking about things your friends care about.  Otherwise, they may think you have become a “downer” and not want to spend time with you anymore.

Also, when you spend time with your friends, try to do fun things.  Suggest going to an amusement park or a spa.  You may even suggest a road trip or weekend getaway.

Get back into the swing of life as well.  There is nothing like going to the gym to get the endorphins working.  It will make you look and feel better.

If you have interests that have lain dormant for a period of time, reactivate them.  Take a cooking class or join a hiking group.

It may also be a good idea to get involved in something larger than yourself.  When you volunteer, you reach out and make a real contribution in your community.  It will put your current pain in perspective for you.

Start to accept dates from guys even if you don’t really feel like going out.  Remember, dinner is not a commitment, it’s just a meal.  As you get back into the swing of things, you will start to feel better about yourself.

If you still are in the blues, seek out professional help.  A neutral therapist can help you get your equilibrium back and a psychiatrist may be able to prescribe short term medication such as Prosac that can help you bet back on track.

I hope these tips were helpful in how to get over a broken heart.  Believe me, this too shall pass.  You will find a new boyfriend and life will be better again.

Healing A Broken Heart

You need help healing a broken heart.  While I might not have an M.D. degree, I can give you some advice on how to get over a break up.

First of all, you need to realize that you are a worthwhile person.  A relationship is a two way street.  If one person is no longer participating, the relationship couldn’t work.  While you might have been able to change some things, you should learn from your past mistakes, but not dwell on them.Just because your boyfriend or girlfriend broke up with you does not mean that you will never be in another relationship again.  In fact, you will probably be dating again before you would guess right now.

If you are going to go about healing a broken heart, you need to be prepared to move on.  A practical and symbolic way to do this is to exchange all of the “stuff” you have of each other’s.  Anything that you don’t give back that reminds you of your ex should be thrown away or boxed up until the pain recedes.

If you owe each other any money, this is a good time to pay up.  As you can see, the idea is to close out the ties that bind.

Then, tell your ex that you don’t want to see or talk to each other for a little while.  While it is possible that you’ll be friends in the future, avoid calling, texting, and emailing each other.  Also, don’t make a point of following your ex on Facebook or MySpace.  By clearing him or her out of your system, you are better able to move on.

Part of healing a broken heart is to get back into the world as soon as possible.  This is a three step process.

First, engage with your friends and family.  Let them support you through this grieving process.  But, don’t bore them with your troubles.  Instead, try to have fun with the people you care about.

Second, engage with the world at large.  Go to the gym and work out because it will make you look and feel better.  Then, look at activities you can start up to fill your time such as a book group or a cooking class.

If at all possible, try to get involved with something larger than yourself by volunteering.  Not only does this fill up your time and take your energy, it also lifts your spirits.

Third, start to date again.  You don’t need to fall in love with the first man or woman that you meet.  Sometimes dinner is just dinner.  Plan to go out on a number of dates with different people during this time when you are “testing the waters.”  Show them a good time, but don’t feel obligated to fall in love.  Remember that a rebound relationship is rarely fun for the other person.

Healing a broken heart takes time.  But you will not be in this position forever.  You will begin to love again.

I love to hear from you.  Please drop me a note....

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What can you do to make your boyfriend or girlfriend hate you.....so that you can break up with them?

I have 8 best tips that you can do so your boyfriend or girlfriend will hate you!  Do these steps and I guarantee.... These tips works for both girls or guys but to simply things, I will use him as a generic gender.

Best Way To Break Up With Someone

1. Be a nuisance and call several times  a day for no apparent reasons.  This will definitely drive him crazy.
2. Keep writing to him and let him know how much you miss him.  Text messages, emails, letters, cards and love notes.  This is a sure way to get his attention and definitely his wrath.
3. Constantly remind him of things he said and promised you.  Highlight to him that once said, it is meant to be forever.  Constantly remind him and do not let him forget.  When you do this, you are indirectly reminding him that leaving you is a good idea.
4. Be a stalker.  Let him feel your constant presence every minute and every where they go.  Make it clear to him that every single breath he takes, you will be nearby and watching.  Give him a grin whenever he sees you.  He will think that you have gone crazy and this will definitely scare him.
5. Bother and irritate his friends.  Try to go everywhere his friends go.  They  will definitely try to get rid of you.
6. Try to be his parent's best friend.  Call them and drop by for a visit regularly.  You will not only get his parents mad but also drive a wedge between him and his parents.  Either way, you are giving your boyfriend more reason to hate you.
7. Go on a date with his best friend without him knowing directly.  Drop hints to his other friends that you are going on with his best friend.  Your actions will make him jealous.
8. Call his workplace and talk to his colleagues asking questions about him or ask to talk to him.  It is a great way to get your boyfriend to hate you, especially if it is going to cost him his job.

The above are 8 sure ways to break up with someone.  However, do bear in mind that at times our partner seems to be a pain to us but if you take the time to communicate with each other, you will realize that a break up may be a wrong decision.

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Sorry to hear about it.  You are not the first guy to go through this.

Do you know that in fact, girls initiate three quarters of the break ups while guys only dump the girl in one quarter of the situations?  Therefore, guys have to deal with being dumped far more often than girls do.Compounding the problem is the impression that men are supposed to deal with their emotions stoically.  While women are allowed to dissect every part of their relationship, men are expected to roll with the punches.

But this doesn’t mean that men don’t have emotions.  They hurt when women dump them.  A girlfriend break up can be  quite painful.

First of all, men tend to place more value on stable relationships than women do.  While a man might be interested in a fling with a woman who is not his girlfriend, what he really wants is someone who will be there in good times and bad.

But, once your girlfriend has dumped you, it’s important to figure out how to pick up the pieces and go on with your life.

• Find some way to express yourself - play the guitar, write music, write great songs about your pain
• Clear all things that remind you of her
• Close off communications, at least for the short term
• Tell your ex girlfriend you want to go silent for a while - no calls, email text messages etc.
• Get out of the house and chill with your other friends
• Get back into the dating scene again.  Start of as group or casual dates.  Do not rush yourself.

Do remember that your break up does not mean that both of you can't be friends again.  In fact, it will reflect very well on you if you can still act like a gentleman whenever you bump into your ex girlfriend.

Sometimes, it is easier said than done.  If you are having problems coping with the break up and need help on how to get your head on straight?

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How To Break Up

I know many guys who find that they still love their girlfriends but are no longer in love with them.  They do not want to hurt her.  On the other hand though, they do not want to be with her either.

Are you experiencing the same?  How do you deal with such a situation?

Here are tips on how to break up with your girlfriend.

Tip 1 - Prepare her ahead of time

Start by preparing her a couple of weeks ahead of time.  Boost her ego by telling her that she is lucky that she is so pretty because lots of guys would fall for her.  Also, pose relationship questions that will make her think about where you two are heading.  Say, “can you see us together for the long haul.”  If she says yes, gently say that you can’t.  Introducing these types of questions and statements into the conversation ahead of time will mentally prepare her for the break up.

But at some point, you will have to cross the line and actually tell her that you don’t want to see her any longer.  This is the hard part of how to break up with your girlfriend.

Tip 2 - What You Need To say

The next question in how to break up with your girlfriend is what to say.  While they are tired lines “it’s not you, it’s me” is really somewhat comforting.  If you are leaving her for another lady, let her know – don’t make her find out from someone else.  The fact that you have been together with her, she deserves to know directly from you.  If you want to remain friends with her, suggest a cooling off period where you don’t contact each other for a month so that when you do talk, the emotions have blown over.

Tip 3 - Choose the "perfect" location

The most important part is choosing the location.  Do not do it when one of you is driving because that could lead to a dangerous situation.

Ask yourself the following questions when deciding on where to tell her about the break up.

• Is your girlfriend likely to make a scene when you break up?
• Is she more likely or less likely to make a scene if other people are around?

For instance, if she’s likely to cry then ask her to meet you at a busy restaurant.  She’s less likely to burst into tears in front of lots of people.

But, if she’s the type to throw a glass of wine at you, you probably don’t want to be embarrassed in front of a lot of people.  Maybe you should do it in private.

Another possible consideration is either to do it at your house or hers.  If you do decide to do it at her house, you can leave immediately after the break up rather than spending lots of time analyzing what went wrong.  However, she may associate things in the house with the break up and since she has to live there, it may make her sad to have broken up at home.

Tip 4 - Commit to the break up and stick with your decision

Once you have made the decision to the break up, stick with it.  Otherwise you will look like a fool.  If you are going to let her talk you back into dating, you might as well have not broken up.

If you notice that the two of you have been drifting apart in the relationship for some time.  Break up will be the best option for the two of you in the long run.  However, be prepared that you will break her heart when you break it off.
Deep down in your heart you don’t want to hurt her.  But, ultimately, a relationship has to be a two way street.  If you are not in love with her any longer, you owe it to her to let her find someone who can fall in love with her.

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Remember, a failed or troubled relationship is not anyone's fault.....

You have to ask yourself several questions to figure out if this relationship is right for you today. Start with, are you happy? You won’t be skipping and picking flowers every second, of course, but in general you should feel happy to be with that person.

You may have a doubt now and then or a bad feeling, but if your feelings toward the person and the relationship are mostly positive, then you could be in a great relationship. Don’t let the odd doubt or strange feeling make you wonder if you’ve made a mistake.

When you do feel doubt or feel sad, why do you? Is it because you’re wondering about a specific other person and thinking that you might be with them instead? Or are they just general thoughts about the possibilities you might be missing if you weren’t in this relationship?

Everyone thinks things like that from time to time. But if you’re preoccupied by “what ifs” and “if only” thoughts, you might not be in the right relationship after all.

Do you feel safe in the relationship? This applies to feeling physically safe, as in your partner would never hit or abuse you. And it also applies to feeling emotionally safe. You feel that they would not want to hurt you for the world.

Do you feel safe from the threat of a break up? Or do you worry about your partner cheating often? If you spend a lot of your time in the relationship wondering if the other person is capable of cheating, then you might not be with the right person.

If you think the person is cheating, then you’re spending a lot of time being suspicious and questioning his or her motives. That’s no way to spend your days. You need to figure out if your doubts are reasonable.

Would that person actually cheat or do you think those things from your own insecurities? If you really don’t trust the other person, you shouldn’t be in a relationship with them. That will only serve to make you miserable and suspicious, and can end badly for both of you.

Do you feel special? If you feel like you’re constantly fighting for the other person’s attention and affection, you might look for someone else. You should feel like the person most important to them if you’re in the right relationship.

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1 - First and foremost, getting back together after a break up means accepting that what happened happened.

It may be hard for you to accept that the breakup happened, but you cannot continue the relationship the way its going. You need to accept that the breakup happened so that you can work on renewing things. Getting back together after a break up means ending the original relationship and then starting new rather than trying to rekindle things in the same way they were before.

2 - Secondly, getting back together after a break up does not begin with calling your ex!

Do not call your ex when you are working on getting back together after a break up. Let things cool down, regulate your emotions and work on thinking about what happened to cause the break up. Getting back together after a break up is going to mean figuring out what went wrong and rectifying it before you call. Work on improving the relationship in your mind, and do not call your ex until things have normalized in your heart and head.

3 - Finally, getting back together after a break up means planning for the right timing.

Once you are feeling like you are more prepared for getting back together after a break up, you can begin to plan the where and how. By the time you are prepared to rekindle things, you will have a better idea about whether you are still in love with him or her or not. Since everything has ended now, don't worry about who is at fault. Instead, focus on getting back together after a break up with positives in mind. Begin with casual conversation, a good friendship, and let things develop from there. If you take things slow and treat them positively, getting back together after a break up is easier than you would imagine.

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Here are the considerations that you need to make when it comes to figuring out how to get back with your ex girlfriend.1 - First and foremost, what was it that you did in order to cause the break up? Girls do not break up with guys completely out of the blue, so there is probably a really good reason behind the action even if you are not immediately aware of what it is. The first step in this process has to be to figure out what went wrong, whether or not it could have been prevented, and how can you can fix it now that you know what it is.

2 - If the break up with your ex girlfriend was entirely your fault, then the first thing that you need to do to help rekindle things is to let your ex girlfriend know that you recognize what happened, you recognize that it was your fault, and that you are sorry for your actions and the unintended consequences.

3 - You should continue to socialize with other people, even though you are trying to court your ex again. Just because you and your ex are not in contact right now, that does not mean that you need to cut yourself off from the rest of the world. You should date another girl, or at least go out and have some fun with your friends. It may even work to your advantage for you to cause some jealousy in your ex partner if you really do want to get them back.

4 - Show your ex that you have moved on, but you also need to show her that you still care about her. This is the most ideal way to eventually get her back. Let her know that you have not completely moved on, and that you still have feelings for her, and this will make you appear more mature to her, and more desirable as well.

5 - Finally, it is important that you work hard to become friends with your ex again. This will build trust, and will help to make you closer to one another.

Afterwards, you should ask her why you broke up in the first place, but be casual about it rather than appearing desperate. She will either admit that it was a mistake that the two of you broke up, or she will let you know that the break up was for the better. Once you have an answer, you can proceed from there.

These are just the beginning steps in winning your Ex back. They are the initial steps I followed when I lost the love of my life. And frankly these aren't my original ideas.

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Have you just recently experienced a break up, and you are wondering "how can I get back together with my ex”? You may want to score your ex back immediately, and this is a common feeling that everyone experiences.

You can find yourself following into an emotionally depressed state, and you may find yourself wondering what to do. You may immediately feel like calling your ex and begging him or her to come back to you. But is this really going to make things better? Rather than make things better, what it is probably going to do is make your situation much worse, chasing your ex away even further. What you should actually do at this point is the opposite of what you are feeling. Do you feel like calling your ex? Don't! Do you feel like staying inside and crying all day long? Don't! Instead, follow these three basic steps and you will have the answer that you need to the age old question "How do I get back together with my ex?"

Accept the Break Up!
First and foremost, you need to accept that the break up is happening. Tell your ex that you are okay with it, and allow the "moving on" process to begin/. When you do this, it will eliminate a large amount of the tension and stress that is being experienced by all. Your ex will need time to think about the relationship, and this will give you time as well to consider your options. If your ex realizes that he or she still loves you, they will find a way to get back with you.

Do not contact your ex!
Do not make an effort to contact your ex anymore right now. You should cut communication off with him or her so that there can be some "thinking time". This may seem counterintuitive, but by cutting communication off you are signaling that you have already moved on and that you are doing just fine.

This will allow him or her to think about the relationship and how they feel about its value. It will also allow them to have some time to miss you again. When you can separate yourself from your ex and can calm your nerves, that may be the best time to let them realize how important you were to them.

Plan Ahead for the Get Together
Once you have completed the two steps mentioned just above, you can start working on planning on when you should meet, where you should meet, and also what should be said when you do meet up again. This will allow you to get a better idea of whether or not your ex still loves you, and also if there is any chance that you and your ex will be able to get back together.